What an amazing decade we just finished up! I mean, what a
roller coaster. I was happy, then sad, then depressed, then happy again, then heart
broken, then angry, then resolved and now I’m back to happy. I ran, I laid around,
I crutched, I learned how to walk again. I loved, I fought for love, I lost
love, I gave up on love, I REALLY gave up on love, and then I found love (plot
twist!). I went from being a DICK to being SICK but feel richer than ever. I found new
friends and lost old friends, I lost family and found family, I had a husband
and lost a husband but I gained a dog, several cats, several hermit crabs and even a
few frogs (may they rest in peace.) I’ve lived in two houses and worked at two jobs. I sat at soccer
fields, basketball courts, track fields, football fields, swimming pools, music
concerts, tae kwon do studios, doctors' offices and lawyers' offices. I loved deeply and lost deeply. I felt alone
and I felt surrounded by support. I cried hard and laughed hard. I felt proud,
humbled, humiliated, joyful, hopeless, blessed, stupid, smart, thankful and loved. If you had told
me at the beginning of 2010 what was going to happen over the next 10 years, I
never would have believed you. Yet here we are.
At first blush this decade may seem like a shit show. I had
major surgery, major depression, a major divorce. But I wouldn’t give any of
that up for a second. That is where all of the good stuff came from. No story
is interesting without the drama, no growth can come from living the status quo.
Without the tragedy, I would have no comedy and where’s the fun in that?
This decade I learned what I was made of. I lost my mojo and
found it again. I consciously made boundaries and discovered what my true
values are. I found my tribe, I found family, I found God. I found out how to
be a better mom and a better friend. There is not one moment I would take back
from this decade. Every step made me the person I am today and I really love
that person. I don’t apologize for who I am anymore but I also try to step with more
kindness, compassion, patience, tolerance and grace than before. While I wouldn’t
mind a less action-packed decade, I know every good story needs a plot. These
last couple of chapters had twist and turns that even I couldn’t predict. But
they were just chapters in my story and my story is long. I can’t wait to see
what happens next.
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