Tonight's Lesson: Cups Don't Poo or My Boys Will Always Be Single

What is it about the dinner meal that we hold sacred? We all make a point of sitting down together, serving a majority of the food groups and holding our conversations to a higher standard.  I accept that I live in a house of three boys, which brings with it a lower level of conversation topics. I can sort of deal with that. But I try to keep the conversation at the dinner table a little more respectable. But tonight's meal was like Charlie Sheen after his Goddesses left - an epic fail.

It all started with a Winnie the Pooh cup. This cup has been used a total of one time and was hidden deep in the recesses of the cupboard. Somehow Rocco remembered this glass which proves that toddlers are scary smart. He asked for the Pooh cup and after a few moments of asking for clarification, I got him the said goblet, unknowingly destroying any chances of having a dignified dinner.

We are sitting at the table, eating and discussing our days. Rocco looks up and says "Pooh poos!"
Me: "What?"
Rocco: "Pooh poos!" giggle giggle
Me: "Did he just say Pooh poos??"
Rest of the table: giggle giggle
Me: "Who taught him that?" *looking at Peter and Max*
Rest of table: stronger giggles as they share glances
Rocco: "Pooh Cup Poos!"
Rest of table: total laughter
Me: "Rocco, cups don't poo."
Rocco: belches
Me: "Rocco, say excuse me!"
Rocco: "I burped!"
Rest of table: belly laughing
Me: "We are starting a rule - no burping at the table!"
Max: "The same as the farting rule?"

I am not the only adult in this house, but I am the only one with estrogen. It would appear that proper dinner conversation is something only girls are taught. Why do I even need to have a rule about farting at the table? And because you are smart readers, you can surely figure out what circumstances brought about the no farting rule.

What is going on when I am not at home? I walk in to find Curious George on TV, not some Two and a Half Men rerun. Is this type of humor taught or something that is ingrained in boys? Nature versus nurture?  I am at a loss. All I know is that it would seem I need to add burping to my no farting rule. That and my boys are not going to have serious girlfriends until they are 30. Stop. Considering that my husband is 34 and still finds this stuff hilarious, let's push that back to 37. We need a bodily function intervention.